NFL Round-Up: Week 12

I'm short on time this week, so we all know what that means....

INTRODUCTIONS?!?!?!?!

Anyway, it's time to talk about some football.......

So................

Sit back........

Grab a beer............

Put the kids outside...........

Tell the wife to leave you alone.........

IT'S TIME............................................

NFL Round-Up

Week 12

The Scoreboard

(A recap of all the action from the past week in the NFL....)

*Due to time restraints, the Monday Night Football games are not included in The Scoreboard


Philadelphia Eagles (4-7): 14    Detroit Lions (4-7): 45

The Eagles are a dumpster fire right now. Chip Kelly needs to fire himself as GM because the guy apparently doesn't know how to build an NFL roster. It's much easier getting college kids to buy into what you're selling than professional football players, isn't it Chipper? There are all sorts of reports that Kelly could be on the outs in Philly and that would be a piss poor mistake by the Eagles management. Kelly is still a solid head coach and he proved that in his first two years in the league by leading Philly to 10-6 records in both of his first two seasons with awful quarterbacks. That's a tremendous coaching job, I don't care what anyone says. What has happened in Philly is that Chip tried to out-smart the room and probably isn't as much of a "football genius" as he thought he was. It's time for him to admit defeat and drop the "GM" title from his name and let someone else do that part of the job. It's obviously affecting his performance. In other news, HOW BOUT DEM LIONS?!?! After an awful start, Detroit is now one of the hottest teams in the league thanks to a guy named JIM BOB COOTER. You want to know what Chip Kelly thinks about Jim Bob Cooter and his offense?

Get it together Chip. This is a "PG" rated column.




Carolina Panthers (11-0): 33      Dallas Cowboys (3-8): 14

It's been a tale of two seasons for these teams. The Carolina Panthers lost their star WR Kelvin Benjamin with an injury in the pre-season and everyone thought the sky was falling and the Panthers were done. Meanwhile, the Dallas Cowboys were humming along and people were predicting that THIS could be the year the Cowboys get back to the Super Bowl. With a roster as talented as Dallas has....no other outcome would be acceptable.

This is why we play the games folks.

Here we are in week 12. The Panthers look like "world beaters" and could go on to have an undefeated regular season. Meanwhile, the Cowboys can't keep Tony Romo healthy and now the immediate future of this franchise is in question.

We feel ya Dez.

Chicago Bears (5-6): 17    Green Bay Packers (7-4): 13

Just when you think you're starting to understand the NFL, the Bears go into Lambeau field and beat the Packers on Thanksgiving. Yes, the same Bears that people thought were absolute garbage heading into the season. Yes, the same Packers who everyone wanted to crown as NFC champions before the season even started.

Once again. This is why we play the games folks.

Buffalo Bills (5-6): 22     Kansas City Chiefs (6-5): 30

The Kansas City Chiefs take out the Buffalo Bills in a match-up that had wildcard implications to it. The Chiefs and the Bills right now are two teams that are battling for that wild card spot (and trust me, they need it because there's no way they are winning the division) and battle they did. This was a fantastic game and I'm not just saying that as a Chiefs fan. The Bills came out hot and were absolutely destroying Kansas City's secondary, but the Chiefs made some half-time adjustments and were able to shut Sammy Watkins out in the second half (it helped that Buffalo didn't really look his way though) and that no doubt earned them the victory in the end. Kansas City has now won their fifth straight game and have looked like a different team since losing Jamaal Charles to a torn ACL. I'm not saying Charcandrick West and Spencer Ware are better for the Chiefs than Charles is....but the team has been playing lights out since the injury to Charles. If they keep winning, things could get interesting on that front in the near future. Is Charles' time in KC coming to an end? LET'S START THE RUMORS!!!

Oakland Raiders (5-6): 24    Tennessee Titans (2-9): 21

The Titans really need to end this losing streak they have going on and the Oakland Raiders came into town and gave them the perfect opportunity to do exactly that. Unfortunately, Marcus Mariota and the Titans came up just a little bit short. That's the story of their season though. They still aren't a very talented team and I honestly don't know if they are going to win another game this season. Their remaining schedule looks like this:

vs. Jacksonville

vs. @ New York Jets

vs. @ New England

vs. Houston

vs. @ Indianapolis

Anyone willing to bet money that the Titans finish the season 2-14? I am.

As for the Raiders, they remain in the playoff hunt....but that schedule is not friendly. They have to face the Chiefs twice, the Chargers, Denver, and Green Bay. If Oakland makes the playoffs this year, a miracle has happened.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers (5-6): 12    Indianapolis Colts (6-5): 25

After a few weeks of seeing the Colts with Matt Hasselbeck at quarterback, it's pretty apparent that Andrew Luck is the problem with the team. If I was the Colts GM, I would trade Andrew Luck as soon as I possibly could and build this team around Hasselbeck. It's more than obvious to me that Hasselbeck could probably play until he's 68 years old. That gives you about 20+ more years of Hasselbeck in his prime and if you can get ANYTHING for Luck...that would be an added benefit.

As a matter of fact. Let me help the Colts GM out. How about you trade Luck to the Kansas City Chiefs for the rights to Jamaal Charles? That gives you a good running back to help Hasselbeck out for the future and sends Luck to a team where he can sit behind a great quarterback like Alex Smith and learn for a few more seasons.

You see that? These NFL GM's should be paying me to come up with trade scenarios like this.

New York Giants (5-6): 14    Washington Redskins (5-6): 20

The NFC East folks..... 

Who wants to win it?

Anyone?

Is there a good team to be found in this division that can win on a consistent basis? We all thought it was the Giants, but that doesn't look to be true. Now, we are all thinking it's the Redskins. Does anyone really comfortable hitching their wagon to a team captained by Jay Gruden and Kirk Cousins? 

New Orleans Saints (4-7): 6    Houston Texans (6-5): 24

The Saints are the Saints and the Texans have been posing as playoff contenders the last few weeks. Go ahead and buy into what the Texans are doing all you want, because I'm not having any. 

Minnesota Vikings (8-3): 20    Atlanta Falcons (6-5): 10

Minnesota Vikings baby! First place in the NFC North just like us fine folks at The Ultimate Sports Blog have predicted all-year. What's not to love about this team? They play good defense. They run the ball well and they have a quarterback who is definitely still learning the game...but has been a solid NFL player so far in his two-year career. The Vikings remind me a lot of other teams who have gone to make great playoff runs in the past. I'm not saying these guys are a surefire bet to get to the NFC championship and the Carolina Panthers should start to worry about them....but I would at least start paying them some attention. They are for real. 

The Falcons on the other hand?

St. Louis Rams (4-7): 7    Cincinnati Bengals (9-2): 31

The Bengals finally get things back on track this week, but we all knew it was coming. Hell, I predicted that they would curb stomp the Rams in this very column last week, so it shouldn't have come as a shocker to anyone who frequents this blog (and shame on you if you don't). What I want to talk about is this man.....

Jeff Fisher is not a very good NFL head coach. He's decent, but he's the pure definition of mediocre.

Wait? What do you mean? I thought he was one of the best coaches in the league?

No. I know he has that reputation because it seems like he's been employed in the NFL forever now, but the guy is getting buy on something that I just can't figure out. Have you looked at his career win/loss record? He's 165-150-1 all-time as an NFL head coach. That's not bad right? If you put it like this...it is....

Fisher has had just six winning seasons in 21 seasons of being an NFL head coach. SIX SEASONS! The reason his overall career win/loss record isn't that bad is because his record is plastered with tons of 8-8 and 7-9 seasons. Everyone knows that when your teams finish 8-8 and 7-9, you likely finish just out of reach of the playoffs and you weren't bad enough to get one of the top picks in the draft that allows you to pull in a franchise player who can come in and change the luck of your franchise. So basically, your team sits in "mediocrity purgatory" and nothing ever happens. Sound familiar? Sounds a lot like Jeff Fisher's NFL teams doesn't it? Look, I'm not saying that the Rams need to fire Fisher or anything, but what I'm saying is pretty simple. As long as Fisher remains the head coach in St. Louis, don't expect this team to get over that hump. It's not going to happen. The guy hasn't made it to the playoffs since 2008. He has yet to have a winning season with the Rams. And for some reason....he doesn't seem to be on the hot seat.

Marvin Lewis and Jeff Fisher are doing something that everyone thought was impossible. They manage to keep their NFL head coaching jobs by being extremely AVERAGE. You hear that NFL head coaches? Just remain average and you'll have job security for eternity. Who needs excellence anymore?

San Diego Chargers (3-8): 31     Jacksonville Jaguars (4-7): 25

This game brought to you by......

Miami Dolphins (4-7): 20    New York Jets (6-5): 38

I don't really know what to make of either one of these teams. The Dolphins have shown glimpses of excellence this season, but for the most part....they are a dumpster fire. They just fired their offensive coordinator and something tells me that by season's end, everyone in Miami will have been fired, including the fans. Miami is such a coaching mess that when you actually watch their games, you see things that make you shake your head. For instance, they tried having the 5'9 Brent Grimes cover the 6'4 Brandon Marshall, which resulted in Marshall going off for 131 yards and 2 TD's. If you watched the game, it was almost comical how Marshall clowned with Grimes who was obviously in over his head (PUN ALERT!) in this game. But it's things like that which make the Miami Dolphins extremely hard to watch at times this season. There is a lot of talent on this team, there's just no one there to direct them all. 

As for the Jets, they remain in the playoff hunt....but does ANYONE buy these guys as legitimate playoff contenders at the moment? The Jets remaining schedule isn't too difficult, so they do have a chance to sneak into the playoffs, but I'm not buying that stock at all. You can go ahead and keep that shit to yourself. 

Arizona Cardinals (9-2): 19    San Francisco 49ers (3-8): 13

This one was never in doubt. These are two teams heading in two different directions. The Arizona Cardinals are heading for the playoffs and a potential Super Bowl berth. The San Francisco 49ers are heading for the NFL Draft and a potential shot at the first overall pick. Like I said....this one was never in doubt.

Pittsburgh Steelers (6-5): 30    Seattle Seahawks (6-5): 39

"We take you to live footage of people trying to get back on the Seattle Seahawks bandwagon...."

New England Patriots (10-1): 24     Denver Broncos (9-2): 30

The Patriots have lost and there goes all hope for an "UNDEFEATED vs. UNDEFEATED" Super Bowl that so many of us were dreaming about. Thanks Brock Osweiler. You've been playing in the league for exactly two weeks now and I already hate you with a passion. Of course, that usually comes with being the Denver Broncos QB.....but that doesn't matter at the moment. Even though the Patriots lost this game, it was still a fun one to watch, especially at the end. The Broncos went down and scored to take the lead, but left too much time on the clock for Tom Brady and the Patriots. Everyone and their mother knew that the Patriots were going to score a field goal to take this thing into overtime and that's exactly what happened. After that kick, I thought this was the Patriots game to lose. Why? Because these kind of games always seem to fall New England's way.

It was not meant to be though! The Broncos ended up scoring a touchdown in overtime and that was all she wrote. Brock Osweiler is now 2-0 in the NFL and people everywhere are all ready to crown him as the "NEXT BIG THING". 

Ummmm. Not so fast my friend. You beat them once, but you still don't have these....

Scoreboard, Patriots.

Monday Night Football Scores:

Baltimore Ravens (4-7): 33    Cleveland Browns (2-9): 27

Fantasy Football Top Performers

(Fantasy football is huge these days. Here are the best fantasy football players from this week)

*Stats are from Yahoo and don't include Monday Night Football teams

Quarterbacks:

1. Russell Wilson

2. Matthew Stafford

3. Ryan Fitzpatrick

4. Philip Rivers

5. Tyrod Taylor

Running Backs:

1. Adrian Peterson

2. C.J. Anderson

3. Eddie Lacy

4. DeAngelo Williams

5. Spencer Ware

Wide Receivers:

1. Doug Baldwin

2. Sammy Watkins

3. Calvin Johnson

4. Markus Wheaton

5. Brandon Marshall

6. Seth Roberts

7. Jarvis Landry

8. Jeremy Maclin

9. T.Y. Hilton

10. Odell Beckham Jr.

Tight Ends:

1. Julius Thomas

2. Antonio Gates

3. Rob Gronkowski

4. Ryan Griffin

5. Vance McDonald

Kickers:

1. Graham Gano

2. Jason Myers

2. Adam Vinatieri

4. Cairo Santos

5. Chris Boswell

Defense:

1. Carolina Panthers

2. Cincinnati Bengals

3. Minnesota Vikings

4. Houston Texans

4. Indianapolis Colts

NFL Power Rankings

(Pretty self explanatory here...)

1. Carolina Panthers (11-0)
2. New England Patriots (10-1)
3. Arizona Cardinals (9-2)
4. Denver Broncos (9-2)
5. Cincinnati Bengals (9-2)
6. Minnesota Vikings (8-3)
7. Green Bay Packers (7-4)
8. Kansas City Chiefs (6-5)
9. Seattle Seahawks (6-5)
10. Indianapolis Colts (6-5)

11. Pittsburgh Steelers (6-5)
12. Houston Texans (6-5)
13. New York Jets (6-5)
14. Atlanta Falcons (6-5)
15. Chicago Bears (5-6)
16. Washington Redskins (5-6)
17. Oakland Raiders (5-6)
18. Buffalo Bills (5-6)
19. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (5-6)
20. New York Giants (5-6)
21. Detroit Lions (4-7)
22. Baltimore Ravens (4-7)
23. Jacksonville Jaguars (4-7)
24. Miami Dolphins (4-7)
25. Philadelphia Eagles (4-7)
26. St. Louis Rams (4-7)

27. New Orleans Saints (4-7)
28. San Diego Chargers (3-8)
29. Dallas Cowboys (3-8)
30. San Francisco 49ers (3-8)
31. Cleveland Browns (2-9)
32. Tennessee Titans (2-9)