NFL Power Rankings: Week 13

Jeremy Lambert is back with his NFL Power Rankings. If you have a problem with them, please don't track him down on Twitter and tell him. He's very sensitive....



Welcome to the Ultimate Football Blog Week Thirteen Power Rankings. Like most power rankings, this list is highly official and should never be doubted. If you disagree with it, you’re probably a moron.

If the Houston Texans make the playoffs, J.J. Watt should win the MVP award.

Last year the Texans finished dead last in the league. This year they are currently 6-6 thanks in large part to Watt’s contributions on defense and offense. Watt, a defensive lineman, has five touchdowns on the season. He’s caught three touchdowns as an offensive player, returned an interception for a touchdown, and returned a fumble for a touchdown. He also has 11.5 sacks, has deflected nine passes, and forced three fumbles.

Simply put, he’s dominating the game on defense. He commands double and triple teams, but still finds a way to make a play. On offense, his three touchdown receptions are more than top receivers and tight ends like Larry Fitzgerald, Vincent Jackson, Vernon Davis, and others.

Watt’s name has already picked up some traction in the MVP race, and while he certainly deserves consideration, he shouldn’t gain much support unless the Texans make the playoffs.

As good as he’s been, getting a team into the playoffs is the true mark of a MVP. My theory is that if a team isn’t good enough to make the playoffs with you, they aren’t good enough to make the playoffs without you. The Most Valuable Player should prove his value by leading his team to playoffs. If he can’t do that, I have to question his value.

Right now Aaron Rodgers seems to be leading the MVP race as he has the Green Bay Packers at 9-3 and winners of four straight games. If you replace Rodgers with an average quarterback, the Packers would be lucky to be a .500 team. That’s the definition of a real MVP.

What Watt is doing is a great story and he’s a treat to watch, but unless the Texans are played past week 17, Watt should only walk away with the Defensive Player of the Year award.

1. Johnny Manziel

JOHNNY FOOTBALL HAS ARRIVED! NOTHING ELSE IN THIS WORLD MATTERS!

2. Vikings Punt Block Team

As always, this comes with an asterisk as it came against a NFC South team, but it’s still pretty impressive to block two punts and return them both for touchdowns in the same game.

3. Ryan Fitzpatrick’s Beard

Ryan Fitzpatrick closed out No Shave November in style with six touchdowns against the Titans.

4. J.J. Watt: Touchdown Machine

Five touchdowns for a defensive player. I already wrote enough about him.

5. Mark Sanchez Thanksgiving Redemption

Sanchez became the butt-end of a joke when he performed The Butt Fumble during Thanksgiving 2012. WHO IS LAUGHING NOW?!?!?! Well, still us. But he had a nice game about the Cowboys on Thanksgiving 2014.

6. Richard Sherman

Maybe Colin Kaepernick should just stop throwing his way. Like. Forever.

7. Colt McCoy

The Redskins may’ve lost, but it wasn’t because of Future Hall of Famer Colt McCoy. It was because their defense sucked.

8. AFC North Leading Cincinnati Bengals

It wasn’t pretty, but they got it done and now lead the division. I might be eating my words in a couple of weeks.

9. Blake Bortles

INT Leader Blake Bortles rallied the Jaguars from a 21-0 deficit to defeat the Giants. Bortles led the team in passing and rushing and would’ve led the team in receiving if he could throw the ball and catch it himself. But that’s not possible, right Gisele?

10. Bye Bye Bye Weeks

It started this week and it lasts until the end of the season. All 32 teams in action every week.

11. Calgary Stampeders

Sometimes you just have to show the CFL a little love. Congrats to the Stampeders for winning the Grey Cup in a game that no one watched.

20. The INT Battle

Bortles still leads, but he had a clean week. Jay Cutler and Andy Dalton are the two names to watch at this point and if Geno Smith remains the starter, he’s always in the race.

32. Geno Smith

HE’S BAAAAAAACK! Geno threw 13 passes and completed seven of them to his team and one to the other team. Welcome back, Geno.

30. The Arizona Cardinals

They lost to a NFC South team and are slowly fading down the stretch. Plus Patrick Peterson talked trash and got lit up by Julio Jones.

50. Travis Kelce Jerking Off

Dustin James sung the praises of Travis Kelce prior to the season. Now he’ll be remembered for fake jerking off on the sidelines.

102. Ron Rivera After A Bye Week

Rivera is 0-4 after a bye week and the Panthers have been outscored 102-36 in those four games. What does he actually spend his bye week doing?

150. Thanksgiving Games

I told you they would all suck.

300. Brian Hoyer

Sorry, Brian

500. Derek Carr

He looked to be Oakland’s answer at QB, but now I’m not so sure.

1000. Ray Rice Situation

Every single person involved in this situation should be ashamed and never allowed to be allowed in football or talk to the media ever again.