Slammin' Stevie Cook's Week 3 NFL Picks

Hi. hello & welcome to Week 3 of the National Football League! I'm Slammin' Stevie Cook, and I was really hoping this series of columns would be more fun than writing about pro wrestling. Instead I'm here talking about domestic abuse & child abuse. Still more fun than wrestling, but it'd really be nice if football players could stop abusing people off the field & we could get back to having fun again. You know things are getting rough when the beer companies have the moral high ground.

Remember when Coors Light was the official beer of the NFL? Shitty beer, but...TWINS!

My pick em picks didn't go great last weeks & my betting picks went even worse. Hopefully this week will go a bit better.

Thursday, September 18

Buccaneers at Falcons (-6.5): The difference between the Week 1 Falcons & the Week 2 Falcons is fairly simple to figure out. The Week 1 Falcons were playing at home against a team without a defense. The Week 2 Falcons were on the road against one of the best defenses in the league. Vive la difference. Matt Ryan went from throwing for well over 400 yards in the best game of his career to throwing for 230 with three interceptions added in for good measure. A great performance in Week 1 & a terrible performance in Week 2. The truth lies somewhere in the middle with this Falcon team. At least the offense has its moments...the defense showed nothing against the Saints & not much more than nothing against an AJ Green-less Bengal squad. They should have an easier time of it this week, as Josh McCown as a starter has proven that he's a pretty darn good backup quarterback.

The Buccaneer bandwagon is down to the loyalists after losses at home to teams quarterbacked by Derek Anderson & Austin Davis. Both games were close, but if you can't get it done against guys like that at home it's tough to get too excited about the rest of your season. Three straight road games await the Bucs followed by a game at home with Baltimore before their Week 7 bye. 0-6 looks like a pretty strong possibility for this team.

As you can tell, I'm pretty excited about this one. 6.5 seems like a lot of points, but the Falcons are capable of lighting up the scoreboard in Atlanta even on a dreaded Thursday night game. If the Bucs keep it close it's going to be because of Bobby Rainey, who just might have taken Doug Martin's job as lead running back.

Sunday, September 21

Chargers at Bills (-2.5): There are some positive stories in the NFL these days. They're tough to find, but they're there. One of them is the fact that the Buffalo Bills have found new ownership that wants to keep them right where they are. Combine that with Jim Kelly currently having the advantage against cancer & Bills fans are riding pretty high these days. The team's doing pretty well too. Got themselves a nice road win in Chicago & blew out the Dolphins at home last week. I'm not sure if it's something that lasts all season (it probably isn't), but it's tough to deny the wave of positivity that's building behind E.J. Manuel & the rest of the Bills right now. How bout that Sammy Watkins?

Chargers are doing pretty well too. I figured a short game week wouldn't help them against Seattle, but apparently the Seahawks took a few too many days off. Philip Rivers had himself a week because he was in my Fearful 4, and Antonio Gates took a dip in the Fountain of Youth. They had that close loss in Arizona, but losing close games on Monday night is a fairly typical Charger thing. Also fairly typical for the Chargers & most West Coast teams...struggles on the East Coast.

NOBODY CIRCLES THE WAGONS LIKE THE BUFFALO BILLS. 3-0? Sure why the heck not. It's gonna be one of those seasons.

Cowboys (-2.5) at Rams: It's a Cowboy game in St. Louis...tell me Fox isn't making Joe Buck & Troy Aikman cover this one. Gonna be a tough enough watch for those that are stuck with it. The Cowboys rebounded from their Week 1 defeat with a strong showing in Tennessee while the Rams went down to Tampa Bay & beat the Bucs. I'm pretty sure the Rams are still bad, but it's starting to feel like the Cowboys can actually get to their typical 8-8 season & blow a chance at the playoffs in December. It's a tradition unlike any other.

I expect the Cowboys to keep things rolling in what could be a friendly atmosphere in St. Louis. You know they're AMERICA'S TEAM, & St. Louis fans have yet to notice that football season's actually started. Expect DeMarco Murray to get a lot of carries against a defense that has been third-worst against the run in the first two weeks. And how about me getting to this point without mentioning Michael Sam? I bet the NFL still wishes that was the main "distraction"...

Washington at Eagles (-6): It might sound strange, but the most positive development for the Washington football team so far this season is probably the installation of Kirk Cousins as quarterback. Cousins plays more to the strengths of Jay Gruden's offensive philosophy than Robert Griffin III does, and he looked pretty damn effective when pressed into game duty against Jacksonville. Granted, it was against Jacksonville, but it sure did look pretty. It looked like the offense that Gruden wants to have running things. This will become an issue if it isn't already (it is already).

The Eagles were impressive in coming back to defeat Indianapolis on Monday night. That's two straight weeks they've needed to come back from double digit deficits to win games, but you can't really argue with the results. Chip Kelly has the kind of offense that doesn't need a lot of time to marticulate points & with guys like Shady McCoy & Darren Sproles running around things are just going to be tough for opposing defenses all season.

Washington's defense has been effective so far, but the Eagles are a step up from the Texans & Jaguars. Take the homeboys.

Texans (-1) at Giants: Your Houston Texans are 2-0 and sitting in 1st place in the AFC South. Perhaps it's not all that surprising considering they've played Washington & Oakland so far, but the Texans are doing what they need to do. Ryan Fitzpatrick has not made mistakes, the defense has held their less than stellar competition in check, and Arian Foster looks like the Arian Foster we knew & loved for so long. Hey, they don't make the schedule, they just play against it. And with that 4th place schedule of theirs, the Texans just might accumulate enough wins to make a playoff push.

The Giants are 0-2 & nobody seems particularly happy about it. Eli Manning has been atrocious with a lack of offensive line help & receivers holding on to the ball. The defense hasn't done much to stop anybody...even a Drew Stanton-led Arizona team put up 25 points without much of a fight. They look bad enough to roll the dice on the Texans here. I don't feel great about it, but some teams are good enough to beat bad teams.

Vikings at Saints (-9.5): Somehow the trainwreck that has been the Saints' first two weeks is the more positive story here, so let's start with them. I did say last week that Saints vs. Browns would be closer than people thought, but I underestimated how bad Outdoors Drew Brees can be & just how tricky the Browns can be at home. Things couldn't have gone worse for the Saints last week, they're thanking their lucky stars that they finally have a home game this week and can go back to looking like Super Bowl contenders.

It was a week ago when I was writing the Week 2 picks column & thought the Vikings had one of the better feel-good stories going. Mike Zimmer led them to a pretty big win against the Rams, Cordarrelle Patterson did his thing, there was still the chance Teddy Bridgewater would see time this year...all things that I like. Then Friday happened & we found out Adrian Peterson was a child abuser. (He said he wasn't...he is.) The Vikings seemingly did the right thing by making AP inactive for Week 2's blowout loss to the Patriots, which most people saw coming anyway because the Patriots are hell to play against the week after they've lost a game.

So, let's review:

-The Vikings didn't play their best player because he's a child abuser.
-The Vikings got blown out.

We had to know the next step, right? Of course Adrian Peterson was made active for Week 3! I don't care about all the excuses GM Rick Spielman & the rest of the Vikings brass want to make. Yes, the justice system will sort it out eventually. But the bottom line here, without a shadow of a doubt is this...

-The Vikings reinstated their best player because they got their asses kicked without him.

That's all there is to it. They don't care about what he's been accused of, whether he's guilty or not guilty, what everybody's stance regarding child abuse is, or what anybody else thinks in the locker room or out of the locker room. If the other players support it, that's great! If the fans support it, great! But the bottom line is this:

-The Vikings reinstated their best player because they got their asses kicked without him.

I'd have more respect for this guy if he just admitted they reinstated AP because they got their asses kicked without him.

That's all that matters in this league. Production. Never forget that. You think Ray Rice would have had his contract terminated by the Ravens if they thought he was still the player he was a few years ago? If Ray Rice produced last year at the age of twenty-six the way Peterson still produces at the age of twenty-nine, he would still be a Baltimore Raven & would play as soon as his suspension gets overturned. But no, Rice's production was going down year by year & they were going to have to find a replacement for him pretty soon anyway. Even if Rice does get that suspension overturned, & I think he will because of the whole double jeopardy thing, I'd be awfully surprised if somebody hired him.

These teams don't care what their stars do. Oh, if the fourth wide receiver or the nickel cornerback does something shady they'll throw the book down on them. A guy on the way out of the league better mind his ps & qs. But a star on the level of Adrian Peterson? Well, that's another story. The Vikings need Adrian Peterson to even have a chance of winning six games in this league. Suspending him is not an option. Not for a GM that needs wins to keep his job, not for a rookie coach that needs to win & win now to justify his hiring. If the league ends up doing something...well, they'll cross that bridge when they come to it. And with any luck, it'll be once Peterson winds down & can't produce anymore.

That's what the Vikings care about. That's what they all care about.

Saints. Their offense is back in the Superdome so they'll be fine. Peterson might not even end up playing if enough sponsors express discontent. If there's one group that the NFL caters towards more than their owners & their stars, it's their sponsors.

Titans at Bengals (-7): Life as a Bengals fan: I am absolutely terrified that the national media is starting to notice my football team after having two good performances to start the season. This is not what Bengals fans are accustomed to, nor does it make us feel good about our future prospects. Because seemingly whenever things start to look really good for the Bengals & we realize they're actually a pretty good football team, disaster strikes. Often, it's in the form of losing to a football team that they have absolutely no business losing to.

And wouldn't you know it, a football team that the Bengals have absolutely no business losing to is coming to Paul Brown Stadium this week. After a solid Week 1 victory in Kansas City the Titans went back home and proved to everybody that they are who we thought they were. DeMarco Murray ran all over the Titan defense, Jake Locker made the fantasy experts that were pimping him all week look like complete morons, & HOW BOUT DEM TITANS became HOW BOUT DEM COWBOYS. Not a good week unless you're Delanie Walker, who might be somebody to keep an eye on this week.

On paper this looks like an easy Bengals pick. I'm rolling with it, but I'm very, very, very, very worried about it.

Ravens (-2) at Browns: The Ravens played the Bengals close late & blew out the Steelers. Nothing to complain about there. This will be their first road trip but those things generally don't harm them too much. Cleveland was their first home, after all. Too soon?

The Browns have also been off to a good start. That first half against Pittsburgh was nothing to write home about, but ever since then they've been doing some good stuff. Terrance West has taken advantage of Ben Tate missing time to show he's one of the best rookies out there & has led a strong rushing offense. Brian Hoyer's been competent enough with some help from Andrew Hawkins. The defense hasn't been great, but Cleveland's been making big plays when they need to.

I think this will be a close game. The Ravens have some extra rest as an advantage & I think their defense will do a better job of stopping West & making life tough for Hoyer than the Steelers & Saints did. Browns could make it close though, keep an eye on that spread.

Packers at Lions (-1.5): I'm a little surprised the Lions are favored here after putting up a whopping seven points in Carolina, but then again they looked really good at Ford Field in Week 1 & blew the Packers out the last time they met in Detroit. The Packers didn't look too great against the Jets but made the classic comeback to get the job done.

I think Megatron & the offense come back strong enough this week to give the Lions the advantage. The Packers haven't shown me enough on defense to indicate that they can stop this team. Now, if it was in Green Bay where the Lions haven't won since 1991, I'd probably have a different answer for you.

Colts (-6.5) at Jaguars: The Colts are 0-2, but there's no real reason for Indy fans to be pushing the panic button. Denver & Philadelphia are really good teams, both of which should be in Super Bowl contention. Losing to them is nothing to be ashamed of...though you really would have liked to hold on to that lead against Philly.

Now, if they lose to Jacksonville...then it might be time to push that button. The Colts should win & I see no reason why it can't be by more than 6.5. The Jags looked awful in the 2nd half against Philly & absolutely horrendous against Washington.

Raiders at Patriots (-14.5): There's not a line high enough for me to not pick against the Raiders here. James Jones did go for 112 yards last week. Darren McFadden got a TD to make whoever's crazy enough to have him on their fantasy team at this point happy. Derek Carr was the Raiders' leading rusher. That's pretty much all I have to say about them. The Patriots should have no issues here.

49ers (-2.5) at Cardinals: I don't think the 49ers are a bad team, but they lost to the Bears in as bad a fashion as you could hope for. Bad interceptions, bad penalties, bad coaching, just bad everything led to the 49ers blowing that lead. Two straight games of not showing up in the second half is not a good sign if you want to be a contender.

Arizona wants to be a contender too. They ran into a problem before the Giants game when Drew Stanton became their quarterback, but things seemed to work all right enough in New Jersey. That being said, the 49ers have a much tougher defense & Stanton didn't exactly have good numbers against the Giants. I'm thinking 49ers by a field goal due to some strong defense.

Broncos at Seahawks (-4.5): We remembered last week that the Seahawks are not as good on the road as they are at home. Remember when they only won at home? They've managed to get a little bit better at these road games, but they're still at their best in Seattle...where they happen to be playing this week.

Remember the last time these two teams played? I expect it to be a lot closer, which wouldn't take a whole heck of a lot, but still. The Broncos have looked all right the first two weeks, but I wouldn't say they're dramatically improved from last year or anything. It's never easy to pick against the Seahawks in Seattle, and I wouldn't advise it here. They'll be ready for this one.

Chiefs at Dolphins (-4.5): I'm not really sure what to make of either of these teams. KC looked better in Week 2, but Jamaal Charles' injury situation has me worried. We'll see what Knile Davis can do. Miami looked worse in Week 2, & Knowshon Moreno's injury situation has me worried. Lamar Miller & Daniel Thomas haven't been a great combination in recent years & I doubt they'll be better now.

This won't be one of the featured games, and it could very well come down to who has a better game between Ryan Tannehill & Alex Smith, the 29th & 35th ranked quarterbacks respectively in quarterback rating. Good times! The Dolphins have homefield and probably a better defense, so I begrudgingly go with them.

Steelers at Panthers (-3.5): Big Ben vs. Killa Cam! Not exactly the biggest SNF matchup of the season, but it should be an interesting game. The Panthers are a strong 2-0 with a win without Cam & a win with him. The constant has been the defense, which kept them in the game with Tampa & totally shut down Detroit. I would expect a similar performance this week against a Steeler team that has been offensively challenged since the first half of the Browns game.

Jeremy Lambert wants me to keep picking against the Panthers, but I do what I want & I want to pick them this week. I wonder if there's a funny bet between him & Larry Csonka for this game. I also wonder how much of this I'll be watching in comparison to WWE's Night of Champions show...probably a lot because I'll need Cam to get me some fantasy points.

Monday, September 22

Bears at Jets (-2.5): The Bears, man. They had no business winning that game in San Francisco after going down 17-0, but everything in the world broke their way & Brandon Marshall single handedly outscored the 49ers. As talented as Alshon Jeffery is, it's going to be tough for him to break up the long-running bromance between Marshall & Jay Cutler. It's also going to be tough for us to figure out what to make of these Bears.

If the Bears excel at making the most of opponents' mistakes, that's a really bad sign for the New York Jets. After getting 11 penalties for 105 yards in Week 1, the Jets merely got 7 penalties for 82 yards in Week 2. They're 1-1 & gave the Packers a heck of a game in Lambeau Field, but they even managed to mess that up by calling a timeout to negate a game-tying touchdown. This team could screw up a wet dream, and the Bears should be able to take advantage of the situation.

And there's another week in the books! Thanks for reading & don't forget all the other great content Dustin provides here on the Ultimate Football Blog! Slammin' Steve Cook signing off.

Last week: 7-9
Overall record: 15-16-1

NFL Power Rankings: Week 2

Here's another guest post from my good friend Jeremy Lambert......

Welcome to the Ultimate Football Blog Week Two Power Rankings. Like most power rankings, this list is highly official and should never be doubted. If you disagree with it, you’re probably a moron and shouldn’t be on this blog. Enjoy. 

1. Leah Sari 

It’s been a shitty week for the NFL but this is a feel good story that isn’t getting enough attention. The Cincinnati Bengals kept Devon Still on their practice squad in order to help him pay for his daughter Leah’s cancer treatment. This past Sunday Devon got to play in his first NFL game as his daughter watched on. 

2. Cam Newton’s Leadership

Remember last year when people thought Cam Newton wasn’t a leader and was immature because he got too happy or too sad before, during, and after games? Those people are long gone. Cam missed a good bit of training camp and wasn’t good in the preseason, yet he still went 22/34 for 281 yards and a TD throwing to a group of wide receivers that he’s never played a regular season game with. All of that on bruised ribs and a bum ankle. 

3. Antonio Gates

You probably thought he, like Larry Fitzgerald, was dead. I guess the Seattle Seahawks thought the same thing because Gates torched the best defense in the league for 96 yards and three touchdowns. 

4. J.J. Watt Offensive Touchdown

Anytime a defensive player scores a touchdown, it’s pretty awesome. When that defensive player is J.J. Watt, a top five defensive player in the league, it’s even more awesome. 

5. Robert Griffin III Coverage

RG3 is always a big hit amongst sports stations. He gave them even more to talk about this week as he decided to get injured once again. Even worse for him, Kirk Cousins continues to prove that he’s a really good quarterback when given the chance. Looks like he’ll continue to get that chance this season. 

6. Peyton Manning

Still really good at football

7. Buffalo Bills Fans

This week they found out that Bills will be staying in Buffalo and then the Bills put a whooping on a solid Miami team to start the season 2-0. We’ve been here before with Buffalo, but it’s still a good story for the week. 

8. Teddy Bridgewater Bandwagon

The New England Patriots were never going to lose two games in a row and the Minnesota Vikings were never going to win without Adrian Peterson. That said, Matt Cassel didn’t give his team a chance and now the Steve Cook-led Teddy Bridgewater Bandwagon is in full effect. Sources tell me that Bridgewater could play as early as this weekend. 

9. Jets Comedy

As if blowing an 18-point lead wasn’t enough, the Jets continue to make us all laugh by still thinking that Geno Smith is a good quarterback and then allowing a defensive player or the offensive coordinator or whoever to call a timeout, which negated an offensive touchdown. The Jets are so much fun to watch for all the wrong reasons.

10. Throwing Flags During Fights

It’s always awesome when 300 pound lineman get into shoving contests after the whistle and the refs respond by throwing a bunch of yellow flags like that’s going to prevent them from stopping. Yellow just means speed up to avoid red. 

11. The Eagles Second Half

Sooner or later they’re not going to win a game when they are down by two scores to start the second half. But playing The Jacksonville Jaguars and Trent Richardson/Bad Refs make things pretty possible. 

15. The INT Battle

Tony Romo and Jay Cutler were quiet in the INT Battle this week, but Eli Manning didn’t disappoint as he threw two more picks. Matt Cassel decided he wanted to win something this week, so he threw three interceptions to tie Eli atop the INT rankings. 

20. Richard Sherman Being Exposed

Phillip Rivers actually threw at Richard Sherman on Sunday. He completed five passes for 60 yards, which led to Keenan Allen saying that Sherman “isn’t a shutdown corner” and that he was “exposed.” Sherman didn’t speak to the media after the game, but took to twitter to deny rumors of him being exposed. Sherman and the Seahawks defense play Peyton Manning and the Broncos offense this week.

50. Jim Caldwell Face

Turns out coaching the Detroit Lions offense isn’t so easy when the opposing team doesn’t leave Calvin Johnson wide open. 

55. Fantasy Running Backs

Adrian Peterson was held out of this weeks game and his future is questionable, Jamaal Charles ran for 4 yards before getting injured, Eddie Lacy had 43 yards, Marshawn Lynch had 36 yards, Matt Forte had 21 yards. Those were five of the top six rated fantasy running backs before the season started. LeSean McCoy (the six RB in that group) didn’t put up huge numbers (79 yards), but at least he had a TD. 

56. Tom Brady Fantasy Owners

People probably saw that the Patriots won 30-7 and assumed that Brady had 300+ yards and 3 TDs. Then they clicked the box score and were pissed to see that he had 149 yards and 1 TD. The same people who started Brady probably sat Steven Ridley. 

66. Victor Cruz Salsa Dance

We may never see it again if he can’t catch the ball. 

75. The Superman Sack

Whenever Cam Newton gets sacked, the sacker always does the Superman pose. Sacking Cam isn’t really that big of an accomplishment given how often it happens, so doing his pose just makes you look unoriginal and stupid. 

80. The Oakland Raiders Without Derek Carr

The Oakland Raiders are a bad football team. If you took away Derek Carr and replaced him with whoever their back-up is, I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t qualify as an NFL team. 

99. Johnny Manziel

The Cleveland Browns are 1-0 when Manziel attempts a pass. 

100. The Tampa Bay Buccaneers Bandwagon

A lot of “experts” were high on Tampa Bay this year because they re-tooled their offense and brought in Lovie Smith. How is that working out for them? You can’t lose to a third string, undrafted, rookie quarterback making his first ever start at home.

101. Mike Nugent

The Cincinnati Bengals put together a very impressive victory yesterday no thanks to their kicked Mike Nugent, who missed three field goals. One is understandable. Two is worrisome. Three and you should probably find a new job. 

120. The RG3 vs. Luck Debate

Remember when Robert Griffin III vs. Andrew Luck was a thing heading into the 2012 and even the season after? Not anymore. 

150. New Orleans Saints Defense

Last week we thought the Atlanta Falcons defense was just really good because Julio Jones and Roddy White were healthy, Devin Hester was a new weapon, and Matt Ryan is a good quarterback. Turns out the Saints defense just really sucks. 

200. Jacksonville Jaguars Offensive Line

They just let just Chad Henne get sacked again. 

1,000. NFL Suspension Policy

Like these power rankings, it’s made up as we go. 

For more deliciousness from Jeremy Lambert, be sure to visit his Twitter page. It's chalked full of good stuff. 

NFL Round-Up: Week 2

Welcome back to the Ultimate Football Blog's NFL round-up! I'm Dustin James and I'm back to recap all the action from Sunday's (and Thursday's) NFL games. I apologize for the quickness of the recaps this week (no I don't, this is my blog and I don't get paid for this....), but I was busy with school stuff (NFL Scouting Academy!), baby stuff, and trying to watch games all at the same time. Anyway, here's what happened yesterday in the NFL.....

(Just like last week, I don't recap the Sunday Night Football game because I have a job in the morning and I can't stay up that late. I'm old. Blame responsibilities.....)

Pittsburgh - 6 (1-1) @ Baltimore - 26 (1-1)


All the drama surrounding the Baltimore Ravens this past week and they still came out and got the job done. There's not much more you can ask for, especially as a Ravens fan. The quicker the team moves on from all the Ray Rice drama, the better it is for everyone involved and that's what they did. I have the Ravens winning the AFC North and I have to admit, I was a little worried about them following all the Rice drama, but they appear to have things figured out. As for the Steelers? This was an atrocious performance, but that's what's expected when Todd Haley is a prominent figure in constructing your offensive game plan.


Pittsburgh Offensive MVP: Le'Veon Bell (11 carries, 59 rushing yards, 5 receptions, 48 receiving yards)

Pittsburgh Defensive MVP: Lawrence Timmons (12 tackles)

Baltimore Offensive MVP: Joe Flacco (21 of 29 for 166 yards, 2 TD's)

Baltimore Defensive MVP: C.J. Mosley (9 tackles, 1 pass deflected, 1 fumble recovery)

Up next for Pittsburgh: vs. @ Carolina (2-0)

Up next for Baltimore: vs. @ Cleveland (1-1)




Miami - 10 (1-1) @ Buffalo - 29 (2-0)


"The best week ever" in Buffalo had to be topped off with a win, right? After Bills fans got fantastic news this past week that the Bills were staying in Buffalo for the foreseeable future, and with the (now cancer-free) Jim Kelly in attendance, the Bills had to come out and whoop AFC East divisional rival Miami, right?  Welp. That's exactly what they did. Buffalo continues to look impressive following their win last week against Chicago and they are in a great position to make a return to the playoffs for the first time in alllllllllooooong time. Congrats Bills fans, you deserve it. It's about time something good happened to you guys. Now don't do something stupid and let Bill Belichick and his band of merry men come back in and steal first-place from you guys. Make this year be the year that the AFC East title returns to upstate New York.



Buffalo Offensive MVP: Sammy Watkins (8 receptions, 117 yards, 1 TD)

Buffalo Defensive MVP: Corey Graham (10 tackles, 3 passes deflected)

Miami Offensive MVP: Ryan Tannehill (31 of 49 for 241 yards, 1 TD, 1 INT, 4 carries, 11 rushing yards)

Miami Defensive MVP: Jelani Jenkins (14 tackles, 1 tackle for loss)

Up next for Buffalo: vs. San Diego (1-1)

Up next for Miami: vs. Kansas City (0-2)



Atlanta - 10 (1-1) @ Cincinnati - 24 (2-0)


The Bengals are good, that is no surprise. The Falcons are not a good football team. That is also not a surprise. The Bengals are the "Rodney Dangerfield"s of the NFL. No one gives them any respect, but they continuously come out and beat teams up on a week-to-week basis. They have a good defense and an effective offense as long as Andy Dalton isn't turning the ball over. Of course, we will all get excited about the Bengals only to have Marvin Lewis and company come out and lay an egg once January rolls around. But hey, we'll worry about crossing that bridge when we get there. For now though, WHO DEY?!?!?!


Atlanta Offensive MVP: Julio Jones (7 receptions, 88 yards, 1 TD)

Atlanta Defensive MVP: Paul Worrilow (14 tackles)

Cincinnati Offensive MVP: Giovani Bernard (27 carries, 90 rushing yards, 1 TD, 5 receptions, 79 receiving yards)

Cincinnati Defensive MVP: George Iloka (1 tackle, 3 passes deflected, 2 interceptions)

Up next for Atlanta: vs. Tampa Bay (0-2)

Up next for Cincinnati: vs. Tennessee (1-1)

New Orleans - 24 (0-2) @ Cleveland - 26 (1-1)

Not only are the New Orleans Saints 0-2, but the Saints are 0-2 following a loss to the Cleveland Browns.

Exactly.



New Orleans Offensive MVP: Jimmy Graham (10 receptions, 118 yards, 2 TD's)

New Orleans Defensive MVP: Junior Galette (4 tackles, 1 sack)

Cleveland Offensive MVP: Brian Hoyer (24 of 40 for 204 yards, 1 TD, 81.7 rating)

Cleveland Defensive MVP: Tashaun Gipson (8 tackles, 1 interception, 1 TD)

Up next for New Orleans: vs. Minnesota (1-1)

Up next for Cleveland: vs. Baltimore (1-1)




Dallas - 26 (1-1) @ Tennessee - 10 (1-1)


Settle down Cowboys fans. The real Tennessee Titans were bound to show up, and it just so happens that it came in week 2. Last week's win over the Chiefs got Titans fans excited that they actually had a real football team, but this loss against the Cowboys went ahead and trampled any of those beliefs. The Cowboys are not a good football team, especially on the defensive side and to only put up 10 points against them at home is just disgusting. However, I may be a little too harsh on the Cowboys. It's probably because my master plan of the Cowboys tanking the season and getting Marcus Mariota now has a real chink in the armor if Rolando McClain and the defense keep playing like this. The Cowboys have another winnable game next week against the Rams, so they have a real chance of starting 2-1 and giving Dallas fans something to get excited about. The Titans on the other hand will likely get their asses kicked when they face the Bengals in Cincinnati.


Dallas Offensive MVP: DeMarco Murray (29 carries, 167 rushing yards, 1 TD)

Dallas Defensive MVP: Rolando McClain (7 tackles, 1 sack, 1 interception)

Tennessee Offensive MVP: Delanie Walker (10 receptions, 142 yards, 1 TD)

Tennessee Defensive MVP: Bernard Pollard (11 tackles, 1 sack)

Up next for Dallas: vs. @ St. Louis (1-1)

Up next for Tennessee: vs. @ Cincinnati (2-0)

New England - 30 (1-1) @ Minnesota - 7 (1-1)


OK, now this makes sense. After Minnesota won in dominating fashion last week and the Patriots lost, I was left questioning what I knew about the NFL. However, the stars re-aligned this week and the Patriots returned to their dominant form and the Vikings returned to sucking. Matt Cassel made sure to remind everyone that he's easily one of the worst starting quarterbacks in the NFL and that he never should have left the side of Tom Brady. Only this time, he wanted to remind the world in front of Tom Brady himself. I picked the New England Patriots to get to the Super Bowl out of the AFC, so I'm relieved to see that they picked their game back up. After the loss to the Dolphins last week, I was a little worried, but every thing looks to be back to normal in "Belichick-Land".


New England Offensive MVP: Stevan Ridley (25 carries, 101 rushing yards, 1 TD)

New England Defensive MVP: Chandler Jones (8 tackles, 2 sacks, 3 tackles for loss, 1 TD)

Minnesota Offensive MVP: Matt Asiata (13 carries, 36 rushing yards, 5 receptions, 48 receiving yards, 1 TD)

Minnesota Defensive MVP: Jasper Brinkley (11 tackles)

Up next for New England: vs. Oakland (0-2)

Up next for Minnesota: vs. @ New Orleans (0-2)




Arizona - 25 (2-0) @ New York Giants - 14 (0-2)


The Cardinals are a good team, that's not a shocker. They won 10 games last season and if it wasn't for the difficulty of the division they play in, they would probably be a favorite to win their division. As for the New York Giants.......

Something's just aren't in the cards. Eli Manning and Tom Coughlin both seem like dead men walking to me.


Arizona Offensive MVP: Andre Ellington (15 carries, 91 rushing yards)

Arizona Defensive MVP: Larry Foote (8 tackles, 1 interception)

New York Giants Offensive MVP: Rueben Randle (4 receptions, 39 receiving yards, 1 TD)

New York Giants Defensive MVP: Jean Pierre-Paul (4 tackles, 1.5 sacks, 2 tackles for loss, 2 passes deflected)

Up next for Arizona: vs. San Francisco

Up next for New York Giants: vs. Houston (2-0)

Jacksonville - 10 (0-2) @ Washington - 41 (1-1)


The Jaguars offensive game plan this week was apparently "let Chad Henne pass the ball". It's a damn wonder they even scored 10 points this week. Seriously though. The Jaguars attempted to run the ball SEVEN TIMES! It absolutely baffles my mind that NFL head coaches can't figure out that to win in the National Football League, you have to run the rock (see: Seattle Seahawks). On the other hand, Robert Griffin III got injured AGAIN and Kirk Cousins got to come in and show Redskins fans what an actual NFL QB can look like. Will Cousins continue to be the savior of the Redskins franchise, while RG III goes on to become one of the biggest busts in NFL history? STAY TUNED!!!!


Jacksonville Offensive MVP: Marcedes Lewis (2 receptions, 71 yards, 1 TD)

Jacksonville Defensive MVP: Josh Evans (14 tackles, 1 pass deflected)

Washington Offensive MVP: Kirk Cousins (22 of 33 for 250 yards, 2 TD's, 109.4 rating)

Washington Defensive MVP: Trenton Robinson (6 tackles, 1 interception)

Up next for Jacksonville: vs. Indianapolis (0-1)

Up next for Washington: vs. @ Philadelphia (1-0)




Detroit - 7 (1-1) @ Carolina - 24 (2-0)


The "team that no one believes in", keeps on rolling. It seems like the Carolina Panthers are one of those teams that actually like when people expect them to fail. When people expect the Panthers to fail, they come out and flip the switch. Before the season started, all the football "experts" were predicting a big fall for the Panthers and here we are two weeks into the season and the Panthers are 2-0 and the other NFC South teams look very questionable/craptastic. Carolina's defense is one of the most underrated units in the NFL and continues to be a work horse week-to-week even with one of their best players on the sideline due to a case of stupidity (Greg Hardy). Before the season started, I had Carolina finishing somewhere around 8-8, but something tells me this team is a lot better than anyone's giving it credit for.


Detroit Offensive MVP: Joique Bell (10 carries, 36 rushing yards, 6 receptions, 61 receiving yards)

Detroit Defensive MVP: Stephen Tulloch (10 tackles, 1 sack, 3 tackles for loss, )

Carolina Offensive MVP: Cam Newton (22 of 34 for 281 yards, 1 TD, 4 carries, 19 rushing yards)

Carolina Defensive MVP: Mario Addison (3 tackles, 2.5 sacks)

Up next for Detroit: vs. Green Bay (1-1)

Up next for Carolina: vs. Pittsburgh (1-1)

Seattle - 21 (1-1) @ San Diego - 30 (1-1)


"OMG! The Seattle Seahawks aren't going to go undefeated this year? Stop the presses everyone!"

First of all, everyone needs to just calm down. We all know the Seahawks aren't as good away from Seattle as they are at home. That's been proven time and time again and that's a big reason the Seahawks need home-field advantage when playoff time comes and that's why winning the division is so important. Plus, it's not like the Chargers are a bad team. They made the playoffs last year and Philip Rivers is one of the most underrated QBs in the league. The guy is always getting bashed by people, but he's proven that he can ball when it matters and it shows by his 3 TD performance against the "Legion of Boom". Seattle fans, calm down. You're still the best team in the league and since you are the reigning Super Bowl champions you should expect to get everyone's best shot. Defending your Super Bowl title is probably even harder than winning the first one. Now you have a target on your back. It's what you do when you have that target on your back that matters......


Seattle Offensive MVP: Russell Wilson (17 of 25 for 202 yards, 2 TD's, 2 carries, 18 rushing yards)

Seattle Defensive MVP: Michael Bennett (5 tackles, 1 sack, 3 QB hits)

San Diego Offensive MVP: Philip Rivers (28 of 37 for 284 yards, 3 TD's, 124.2 rating)

San Diego Defensive MVP: Melvin Ingram (5 tackles, 1 sack)

Up next for Seattle: vs. Denver (2-0)

Up next for San Diego: vs. @ Buffalo (2-0)

St. Louis - 19 (1-1) @ Tampa Bay - 17 (0-2)


Two teams that I was pretty high on before the season started and they've both come out and disappointed in big ways. Both teams have good head coaches and good rosters to work with, they just have issues at the QB position among other things. Let's hope these guys get things turned around because as of right now, they both look like contenders for the #1 overall draft pick next summer.


St. Louis Offensive MVP: Zac Stacy (19 carries, 71 yards, 1 TD's)

St. Louis Defensive MVP: Rodney McLeod (5 tackles, 1 interception)

Tampa Bay Offensive MVP: Bobby Rainey (22 carries, 144 yards)

Tampa Bay Defensive MVP: Dashon Goldson (11 tackles, 1 fumble recovery)

Up next for St. Louis: vs. Dallas (1-1)

Up next for Tampa Bay: vs. @ Atlanta (1-1)




Kansas City - 17 (0-2) @ Denver - 24 (2-0)


Well, I guess that wasn't as bad as we were expecting Chiefs fans. When Jamaal Charles went out with an injury when the game started, I figured the rout was on. Denver is a much better football team than Kansas City is and I'm surprised they let the Chiefs hang with them in this game. Kansas City was missing it's best offensive player and one of it's best defensive players (Derrick Johnson is out for the year with an injury) and they still managed to hang with the Broncos so there is some hope left for this season. Personally, I'm hoping that the wheels completely fall off and the Chiefs get a top draft pick in next year's draft. This squad isn't winning anything this season and I'm always happier with a top draft pick than a mediocre 8-8 season that places you with the 15th pick in the draft. Marcus Mariota to Kansas City is sounding good, especially with the QB play that Alex Smith's been demonstrating these last two weeks. Denver is the team to beat right now in the AFC, like that should come as a shocker to anyone reading this.


Kansas City Offensive MVP: Knile Davis (22 carries, 79 rushing yards, 2 TD's, 6 receptions, 26 receiving yards)

Kansas City Defensive MVP: Tamba Hali (4 tackles, 1 sack, 2 tackles for loss)

Denver Offensive MVP: Peyton Manning (21 of 26 for 242 yards, 3 TD's, 143.9 rating)

Denver Defensive MVP: Von Miller (7 tackles, 1 sack)

Up next for Kansas City: vs. @ Miami (1-1)

Up next for Denver: vs. @ Seattle (1-1)




New York Jets - 24 (1-1) @ Green Bay - 31 (1-1)


Geno Smith vs. Aaron Rodgers?

New York Jets Offensive MVP: Eric Decker (4 receptions, 63 yards, 1 TD)

New York Jets Defensive MVP: Demario Davis (6 tackles, 2 sacks, 3 QB hits)

Green Bay Offensive MVP: Jordy Nelson (9 receptions, 209 yards, 1 TD)

Green Bay Defensive MVP: Tramon Williams (5 tackles, 1 interception, 2 passes deflected)

Up next for New York Jets: vs. Chicago

Up next for Green Bay: vs. @ Detroit (1-1)

Houston - 30 (2-0) @ Oakland - 14 (0-2)


Houston might be a lot better than I originally gave them credit for. Defensively, they have been fantastic so far and their offense has been working smoothly enough. Hell, when this happens....

.....life is good. As for Oakland? The less I say about them. The happier everyone is.


Houston Offensive MVP: Arian Foster (28 carries, 138 rushing yards, 1 TD, 2 receptions, 12 receiving yards)

Houston Defensive MVP: Johnathan Joseph (5 tackles, 1 fumble recovery)

Oakland Offensive MVP: James Jones (9 receptions, 112 yards, 1 TD)

Oakland Defensive MVP: Tyvon Branch (12 tackles)

Up next for Houston: vs. New York Giants (0-2)

Up next for Oakland: vs. @ New England (1-1)

See you in week 3!

College Football Rankings: Week 3

Week 3 of the college football season is in the books and here are the official rankings for The Ultimate Football Blog following this weekend's action. Be warned. It wasn't the most exciting weekend in college football.....


College Football Rankings Week 3


1. Florida State Seminoles (2-0) - BYE WEEK

2. Oregon Ducks (3-0) - defeated Wyoming 48-14

3. Alabama Crimson Tide (3-0) - defeated Southern Mississippi 52-12

4. Oklahoma Sooners (3-0) - defeated Tennessee 34-10

5. Auburn Tigers (2-0) - BYE WEEK

6. LSU Tigers (3-0) - defeated Louisiana-Monroe 31-0

7. Texas A&M Aggies (3-0) - defeated Rice 38-10

8. Baylor Bears (3-0) - defeated Buffalo 63-21

9. Ole Miss Rebels (3-0) - defeated Louisiana 56-15

10. UCLA Bruins (3-0) - defeated Texas 20-17

11. Notre Dame Fighting Irish (3-0) - defeated Purdue 30-14

12. Michigan State Spartans (1-1) - BYE WEEK

13. Missouri Tigers (3-0) - defeated UCF 38-10

14. Florida Gators (3-0) - defeated Kentucky 36-30

15. Arizona State Sun Devils (3-0) - defeated Colorado 38-24

16. Georgia Bulldogs (1-1) - lost to South Carolina 35-38

17. North Carolina Tar Heels (2-0) - BYE WEEK

18. Ohio State Buckeyes (2-1) - defeated Kent State 66-0

19. Kansas State Wildcats (2-0) - BYE WEEK

20. Nebraska Cornhuskers (3-0) - defeated Fresno State 55-19

21. Washington Huskies (3-0) - defeated Illinois 44-19

22. Stanford Cardinal (2-1) - defeated Army 35-0

23. Clemson Tigers (1-1) - BYE WEEK

24. BYU Cougars (3-0) - defeated Houston 33-25

25. South Carolina Game Cocks (2-1) - defeated Georgia 38-35


Just missing the cut: USC Trojans (2-1), Oregon State Beavers (2-0), Wisconsin Badgers (1-1), Penn State Nittany Lions (3-0), Pittsburgh Panthers (3-0), Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets (3-0), Duke Blue Devils (3-0), Arizona Wildcats (3-0)

Slammin' Stevie Cook's Week 2 NFL Picks

Hi, hello & welcome to Week 2 of the National Football League! I'm Slammin' Stevie Cook, back again to run through the slate of games and make predictions. I'm still in the process of figuring things out, like if I should continue with the gambling slant or just go to a straight up pick em. Let me know what you think on Twitter @OchoSports, or via e-mail at scook411@gmail.com if you're still into that. I also still do snail mail, but I'm not printing my address here in case somebody loses too much money & wants to break my kneecaps.  I like my kneecaps very much.

Week 1 was plenty exciting, but I think Week 2's going to be even better. Let's hook em up!

Thursday, September 11

Steelers at Ravens (-2.5): Neither of these teams had the best of days on the football field Sunday. Pittsburgh looked like they were on their way to a blowout win over a dreadful-looking Cleveland team like most of us expected, but blew a 24 point lead in the second half & only managed to win the game by kicking a field goal as time expired. Not exactly a great sign for the people claiming the Steelers are going to be so much better this season. On the bright side, Le'Veon Bell had himself a 100+ yard day, Dustin's favorite player LeGarrette Blount got to vulture a touchdown, and Antonio Brown had his typical great game while also providing us with the *Sponsor To Be Named* GIF Image of the Week:

We can knock the Steelers' second half performance or lack thereof, but a win is a win & they are sitting at 1-0. The Ravens are not, as they lost at home to the Bengals after storming back from a 15-0 deficit to lead 16-15 before AJ Green did AJ Green things. The Ravens can take solace in Justin Forsett looking like a starting running back in the second half (Bernard Pierce sure as hell didn't look like one in the first half) & Steve Smith Sr. still telling people to ice up son at the ripe old age of 73 with a nice 80 yard TD catch & run. I don't think people in Baltimore are swimming in positivity though, as losing at home to a division rival to start the year is always a kick in the knickers. Losing two straight at home to division rivals to start the year...well, your year wouldn't be over but you'd be digging yourself a pretty big hole to climb out of.

I won't delve into the Ray Rice quagmire here because it makes me sad & I like to write about happy things (To sum it up in one sentence: The NFL & the Ravens fucked up & should be ashamed of themselves.), but one has to figure that if Michael Sam's existence in a locker room & Johnny Football partying with Justin Bieber & Drake qualify as distractions in the world of professional football, there's a whole lot of distraction going on in Baltimore right now. The Steelers can concentrate on football & weed like every other team, and I think that's enough to get them the win.

Sunday, September 14

Dolphins at Bills (+1): As much as people like to pretend they're NFL experts and know everything there is to know about the sport of football, things happen every single week that nobody predicted. Some will backtrack & then claim they saw them as possibilities to make themselves look intelligent, but we know they're lying. I can pretty much guarantee that nobody reading this column thought last week that Week 2's tilt between the Dolphins & the Bills would be a battle of 1-0 teams. With Miami hosting the perennial AFC East Champions from New England & Buffalo traveling to Chicago to play Da Bears, most would have figured Week 2 would have two 0-1 teams going at it.

The first half in Miami went like we figured it would. The Patriots took a 20-10 lead while the Dolphins bumbled around like they've been known to do since Dan Marino retired. It looked fairly typical. After the half the Dolphins were a different football team. Knowshon Moreno got 91 of his 134 rushing yards after the half & made Lamar Miller's fantasy owners wonder about their future plans. Ryan Tannehill was solid enough to get the job done. Miami's defense had no problem getting around the feeble New England offensive line or covering the random dudes that make up the Patriot receiving corps. It was domination by the Dolphins. They were not who we thought they were.

Neither were the Bills. Chicago went into this season with all sorts of grand expectations like they usually do, while Buffalo went in with no expectations like they usually do. Turns out they were two evenly matched teams on Sunday. The Bills took advantage of the Bears' utter lack of run defense by having three guys run for over fifty yards. By the way, good luck figuring out who Buffalo's top running back will be on any given week. Now Anthony Dixon's in the mix too. CJ Spiller helped wear the defense down while Fred Jackson got a 38 yard run during overtime to set up the field goal & the improbable victory for the Bills.

Are these teams for real? One of them's going 2-0. Unless they tie, which would be funny. I'm thinking the Bills have the advantage here being at home, where everybody's actually going to be happy for once since the team is getting sold to somebody that'll keep it in Buffalo. The Bills at 2-0? I'm sure stranger things have happened at some point.

Jaguars at Washington (-6): The Jags lost to Philadelphia like we all expected, but they did get off to quite the hot start. They got Nick Foles to fumble on the Eagles' first two possessions, Allen Hurns (who?) scored touchdowns on the Jaguars' first two possessions, & the Jaguars led 17-0 at the half! That didn't last. But it was fun while it did, by cracky!

Nothing about Jay Gruden's first game as Washington head coach could be classified as fun. They scored early, the extra point got blocked, and it was all downhill from there in an uninspiring loss to the Houston Texans. Things should be better this week since they're hosting Jacksonville, right?

Right?

6 points sounds like way too many points here. I'm actually thinking the Jaguars cover. Not sure they win the game, but RG3 & company didn't do a lot in Week 1 to inspire confidence that they can beat anybody by a touchdown. And hey, the Jaguars did look good in that one half. Pump the brakes on that Blake Bortles bandwagon, kids. Chad Henne's here to stay! For at least a little while anyway.

Cowboys at Titans (-3.5): HOW BOUT DEM 0-1 COWBOYS? Most of us expected them to get creamed by San Francisco in Week 1 & that's exactly what happened. Tony Romo did Tony Romo things, the defense didn't feel like stopping anybody & couldn't have if they wanted to, and Jerry Jones spent the game calculating how much money he'll make on Michael Sam jerseys when they call him up around Thanksgiving time.  Jason Garrett spent the game picking his nose, so it's not like he was much more useful. There isn't much to say about the Cowboys effort in Week 1 other than there wasn't much of one.

The Titans are coming off a Week 1 loss at...wait a minute, they won? In Kansas City? By sixteen points? What is this sorcery? Jake Locker did well enough at QB that people are hyping him as a fantasy option in Week 2 (Not the worst idea, we've already established that the Cowboys have no defense.), the defense picked Alex Smith off three times, and they also made Andy Reid forget that Jamaal Charles was on his roster. Not sure how that happened.

So, to review: The Cowboys can't stop anybody. Tennessee's defense got the opposing QB to turn the ball over three times. The Cowboy QB1 is Tony Romo.

HOW BOUT DEM TITANS? I don't know if this thing's going to last, but Ken Wisenhunt seems to have at least temporarily found something that works.

Cardinals at Giants (+1): Both of these teams played on Monday night, which I find to be more fair than the Seahawks/Chargers matchup discussed later where one team played on Thursday night & the other played Monday night. Wildly different results for each team, as the Giants got blown out in Detroit by Calvin Johnson (the other Lions were involved too, but let's be real, it was mostly Megatron) while the Cardinals eeked out a win when San Diego went all San Diego. Eli Manning threw two interceptions. Carson Palmer threw two touchdowns. One team looked like a team that could make it to the playoffs if things break the right way. The other team plays in New Jersey so they'll get more attention from the media.

When I added the odds in before I started writing stuff, the line was at Giants -2. Now it's at Cardinals -1 with other sites being even. I think people saw the Giants being favored & started throwing money at Arizona. I don't blame them, as I was wondering what the heck people were thinking with Giants -2. The Giants just don't look like a good football team & the Cardinals have a defense that will make life tough for Eli Manning.

Patriots at Vikings (+3): I expected the Vikings to go into St. Louis's dome & win the game because the Rams have no offense to speak of. I didn't expect them to win 34-6. The Rams are somehow worse than we expected, but perhaps there's something going on up in Minnesota. Mike Zimmer is a coach I have a very high opinion of, they've got two of the most dangerous playmakers in the NFL in Adrian Peterson & Cordarrelle Patterson, and the defense can at least make plays against the likes of Shaun Hill & Austin Davis.

The honeymoon period for Mike Zimmer & the Vikings is still going strong.

The difference is they're going up against Tom Brady this week. The Patriot offense looked like they typically look in the 1st half against Miami. We forget that because of what happened in the 2nd half, but you know as well as Bill Simmons & I do that you never want to play New England after a loss. I think the Vikings are interesting this year, but the Patriots should be able to win this week by more than a field goal. Unless something's horribly wrong with Tom Brady & nobody's talking about it.

Saints at Browns (+6.5): Both of these teams were involved in offensive shootouts last week. Cleveland's was kind of by accident, as they were down 27-3 at one point before Dick LeBeau retired in the middle of the game & the Steelers stopped playing defense. Ben Tate got hurt & now we're looking at Isaiah Crowell as the main (only) fantasy option coming out of Cleveland until Josh Gordon's suspension gets reduced.

Have you noticed how NFL writers are so defensive of Josh Gordon & his right to smoke doobies? I mean, it's obviously silly that a first-time offense for pot-smoking gets a longer suspension than beating your girlfriend/wife does (until the video gets released of course), but I think guys like Jay Glazier & Mike Florio have a particular interest in this issue for reasons that you can figure out by connecting some dots. I still don't see how Gordon is a victim of anything other than addiction, but he'll keep getting chances because he's talented & in the prime of his football career.

The Saints were involved in probably the game of the week, losing by a field goal in Atlanta in overtime. Not much to be ashamed of there, other than a complete & utter lack of defense, but that's nothing new for the Saints. Cleveland can be a tricky team to play in their stadium & the Saints have never really been known as a road team, so I'm actually going to recommend putting your money on the Browns. I'm not saying they're going to win, but it could be closer than people think.

So far I've recommended gambling on the Bills, Jaguars & Browns. You might wonder if I've been engaging in the activities that I implied that Jay Glazier & Mike Florio enjoy.  Nah, just drinking some Hawaiian Punch Berry Bonkers.

I am now too cheap to buy beer on a regular basis.

Falcons at Bengals (-5.5): The Falcons & Bengals are both 1-0 & both took part in tough divisional games last week. Interesting matchup here pitting two of the top wide receivers in the NFL against each other. A.J. Green & Julio Jones were taken with the 4th & 6th pick respectively in the 2011 NFL Draft, and both men have played key roles in their teams' success since then. Or lack thereof, as we saw Atlanta's performance nosedive last year when Jones was out with injury. They will likely be compared with each other for the rest of their careers, and their teams will benefit from the competition.

I think the difference comes down to defense. We were worried about Cincinnati's defense with the departure of Mike Zimmer, but they seemed like the same old Bengal defense in Baltimore in Week 1. Certainly a step up in competition from the Saints defense that the Falcons faced in Week 1...but the Bengals saw no wide receivers like Jones or Roddy White in Week 1 either. The Falcons D didn't get much done against New Orleans, but the Bengals offense was pretty happy to kick field goals on Baltimore until their final drive.

I got the Bengals winning, but I think it's going to be close enough that the Falcons will beat the spread. Should be a good game. If it doesn't sell out I might just grab myself a ticket.

By the way, with all the horrible football news garnering headlines these days it's good to see some attention directed towards Bengals defensive tackle Devon Still. His four year old daughter is battling cancer & the team has stood behind him by keeping him on the practice squad & selling his jersey, with all the proceeds going to Cincinnati Children's Hospital & Pediatric Cancer Care & Research. Whenever you're a fan of a team you'd like to know that your organization gets it, and as a Bengals fan I love that the team is doing this. His agent tweeted that he was promoted to the main roster, it hasn't been confirmed yet but I certainly hope for the best for Devon & his family.

Lions at Panthers (-2.5): Cam Newton is expected to be back in this game, which should be a good thing. I almost wonder if the Panthers should hold him out another week simply because the Lions are among the dirtiest teams in the league & you know they'll be targeting Cam's ribs. We'll find out what kind of shape he's in, that's for sure. The rest of the team did well enough in his absence against Tampa Bay. Kelvin Benjamin looks like he could be a solid receiver, DeAngelo Williams & the RBs did enough clock killing, and they got to play Tampa Bay, who don't have much in the way of offense.

It's a little bit different this week. Megatron is at full force, Golden Tate got 90 yards & provides a proper WR2 that the Lions haven't really had in years, and you never know who will get the ball between Bell & Bush but you know somebody would. As much as I'd like Cam to come back strong for my fantasy football efforts, I fear he'll be up against a bit too much this week. Lions to win. Jeremy Lambert would complain about this if he wasn't too busy tweeting at sixteen year old girls. BOOM ROASTED.

Rams at Buccaneers (-5.5): The Rams were even worse than I expected in Week 1. Shaun Hill lasted one half before getting his quad injured...Austin Davis was somewhat better I guess, but that's like comparing horse manure to cow manure. At the end of the day it's still manure, so one being better than the other doesn't make it good. The running game was basically non-existent. The vaunted Rams defense was no match for Cordarrelle Patterson. It was a bad day in St. Louis. Happens a lot.

Fortunately for the Rams, Tampa Bay has nobody resembling Cordarrelle Patterson on their team. They managed to lose to a backup quarterback in Week 1, and I even know Panthers fans that think Derek Anderson is a good quarterback now. It's pretty amazing. Doug Martin was about as effective as a regular hamster against the Panthers, Josh McCown played like a career backup quarterback, and a late rally couldn't really cover up the fact that even with a new coach the Bucs still have a long way to go.

So I get to pick one of these teams now. Yay. I got the Rams covering in a low-scoring affair. I don't really have a reason for this other than I don't think either team will put too many points on the board.

Seahawks at Chargers (+5.5): We were all pretty much ready to crown the Seahawks as 2-time Super Bowl Champions after Thursday night's game. The Packers had absolutely no answer for the Seahawks on either side of the ball most of the night. Defense was doing their thing against Aaron Rodgers, Marshawn Lynch was going all Beast Mode, guys we'd never heard of were scoring touchdowns...it was good times for Seattle. If I was an NFL Power Rankings guy I'm not sure who I would put ahead of the Seahawks based on Week 1. Probably nobody.

San Diego did not have good times on Monday night. Not at all. It was one of those low-scoring games that I've become accustomed to as an AFC North football afficinado, and as usual on Monday night they found a way to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. I expect the Chargers to fare better once they start playing teams that are not tough on defense & will give Philip Rivers enough time to figure out what he's doing. Unfortunately, they play the toughest defense in the league this week. Oh, and Seattle last played on Thursday night while San Diego was in the Monday late game, so they're going to have four days of extra rest. That's just not fair. Take the Seahawks.

Texans at Raiders (+3): RYAN FITZPATRICK! DEREK CARR! TEXANS! RAIDERS! THE NFL ON CBS! I saw people saying that Houston should have taken Carr in the Draft, but does anybody really think that Texan fans would buy into another Carr at QB1? Not a chance in hell. Sure, Fitzpatrick has as much chance of leading a team to a Super Bowl as I do, but people have not forgotten David Carr in Houston. No, not at all. Lord knows they'd like to.

At least the Texans are 1-0 after defeating the Washingtonians. The Raiders got to make the cross-country flight to New Jersey to lose to the Jets in a game I'm sure was utterly fascinating. Honestly I don't even want to look at the ESPN recap & box score for that game, but I'm doing it anyway for you people. Oh, Rex Ryan says it should have been a "rat kill". I'm not sure what that means, but probably nothing good in relation to Oakland. Carr did throw two touchdowns. DMC & MJD combined for a miserable 26 yards. Someday they hope to be merely awful. MJD's long run was 12 & he got 11 yards total in the game. We're reaching the point where he can't be referred to by his initials, which sucks because Maurice Jones-Drew is annoying to type.

I was wondering how the Raiders were dogs at home. I shouldn't have. Texans. I'm not terribly high on them either but at least they have some players capable of doing things on a football field. J.J. Watt will make a ridiculous play or two.

Jets at Packers (-8): The Jets were also in that football game I just read about, and they did some useful things. Over 200 yards of rushing & good defense against the run. They also got 11 penalties for 105 yards, which won't get it done against teams that are not the Oakland Raiders.  They get to go to Green Bay this week, and you know the Packers have to be in a wonderful mood after getting their asses handed to them in Seattle.

I'm trying to make an argument for the Jets based on their defense, but I just don't see enough offensive firepower on their side to take advantage of any lapses by Aaron Rodgers & the Packer offense. Add in the fact they've had a couple of extra days to stew in their anger & prepare for Rex Ryan's team, you gotta figure the Packers win by double digits.

Chiefs at Broncos (-13): This sounds like a pretty high line at first glance, perhaps an over-reaction to Week 1, where the Broncos pulled out the win over Indy while the Chiefs got demolished at home by Tennessee. One has to hope that Andy Reid plans on getting the ball in Jamaal Charles' hands more than eleven times this week...I saw that box score and assumed that the guy had gotten injured. No, they just had an awful game plan. I also think they may have taken Tennessee lightly, which is something that your younger teams will do. (KC is the third-youngest team in the league.)

Denver looked pretty good in the first half. I feel like I've led off most of my paragraphs with this phrase or something similar to it. This is probably why I'm writing for the Ultimate Football Blog & not Gawker or something. Anyway, the Colts came back in the 2nd half to tie the spread, which is always a good time. I don't remember if Al Michaels mentioned that or not, I do remember Cris Collinsworth making fantasy football references. The Denver defensive effort in the 2nd half wasn't exactly awe-inspiring, but Andy Luck seems to have that kind of luck so I'm not sure how much to read into it.

I like the Broncos to win this game, but 13 seems like a pretty high number. I'm seeing 13.5 in some spreads as well. If it stays this high, go with the Chiefs as I'm thinking it'll be a 10 point win for the Broncos. They've shown that they can take the foot off the gas, and I have to believe that KC will come out with a better effort this week.

Bears at 49ers (-7): Lots of people were worried about San Francisco heading into the season. That worry was mostly cooled by their demolition of the Cowboys. It was 28-3 when things still mattered...the Cowboys scored a couple of times late but I think the 49ers 4th string defense was in at that point. Though it should be kept in mind that the Cowboys are not a very good football team, I'm still thinking that's enough to make you feel comfortable with the 49ers at 7 points or somewhere in that range.

There's no real reason to feel comfortable with the Bears. They turned the ball over three times against Buffalo, including two interceptions. You can count on the 49ers getting at least two interceptions.  Chicago can't stop the run, and Frank Gore & Carlos Hyde should be able to take advantage of that. Defenses that can't stop the run also have a tough time against Colin Kaepernick, who can run or pass or whatever the situation calls for. Maybe Chicago shows up this week & makes people feel ok for picking them to go far in the playoffs, but the 49ers feel like a safer bet. I also think it's a safe bet you can go to sleep earlier than you did last Sunday.

Monday, September 15

Eagles at Colts (-3): The Eagles losing 17-0 to Jacksonville at the half was one of those scores to had to look at a couple of times to make sure you weren't hallucinating. Things eventually sorted themselves out and maybe it was just a hiccup by Philly, but it was still kind of weird. The Colts had a bad first half as well, but since it was in Denver we all kinda saw it coming. We all kinda saw them storming back in the second half to tie Vegas happening as well. That's just how they roll.

I'm looking forward to this Monday night game. Shady McCoy will probably be running all over the place & not tipping people on his merry way, Darren Sproles will do his thing, and Luck will probably have some late game magic. It'll be back & forth, could be a 3 point game so the spread's tricky, but I'm liking the Colts to take it.

And there's another week in the books! Thanks for reading & don't forget all the other great content Dustin provides here on the Ultimate Football Blog! Slammin' Steve Cook signing off.

Last week: 8-7-1
Overall record: 8-7-1

NFL Power Rankings: Week One

Welcome to the Ultimate Football Blog Week One Power Rankings. Like most power rankings, this list is highly official and should never be doubted. If you disagree with it, you’re probably a moron and shouldn’t be on this blog. Enjoy.

1. Seattle Seahawks 

This team is really good. They won the Super Bowl last year and opened this season by whooping up on a highly talented Green Bay Packers team. They have the best defense in the league, a balanced offense, and a great decision maker at quarterback. They are the favorites to repeat as Super Bowl champions for a reason.

2. Tony Romo vs. Eli Manning vs. Jay Cutler INT Battle

Right now Romo holds a 3-2-2 edge, but this will be a fun battle to monitor all season. All three QBs looked to be in elite form in week one and I have a feeling that this will continue throughout the season. I wouldn’t be shocked if all three guys end up with over 15 INTs for the season.

3. Cordarrelle Patterson

3 carries, 102 yards, 1 TD. Has any player ever finished a game with over 100 yards on less carries? I’m too lazy to do the research, but I bet it hasn’t happened often.

4. Matt Ryan

Must be nice to have Julio Jones and Roddy White healthy, plus a new weapon in Devin Hester.

5. Peyton Manning

Still really good.

6. Alex Smith’s Bank Account

No matter how bad Alex Smith is, he’s still getting paid.

7. Antonio Brown

Because landing a flying jump kick to the face of the opposing kicker is always awesome.

8. Ben Tate’s Doctor

When Ben Tate was a back-up running back, he couldn’t stay healthy. Now he’s a starter and he’s already injured after week one. His doctor might be the highest paid person in the league.

10. Derek Anderson

Best back-up QB in the league

15. Jamaal Charles Fantasy Owners

It’s only one week. It’ll be alright.

22. The Corpse Of Larry Fitzgerald

How much more evidence do we need before it’s official that he isn’t an elite wide receiver anymore?

31. San Diego Chargers

Never stop being you.

32. New York Giants Secondary

How can you leave Calvin Johnson wide open that many times? He’s only the best receiver in the league.

40. New England Patriots Offensive Line

The Miami Dolphins just hit Tom Brady again.

45. Buffalo Bills Fans

Don’t get too excited just because you beat the Chicago Bears in Chicago to start 1-0. We’ve been here before.

50. Adam Jones

Ice Up Son

51. Eli Manning Hand Signals

What was this hype all about? The Monday Night Football crew wouldn’t shut up about how the up-tempo Giants offensive with Manning doing a bunch of hand signals was going to give teams trouble. Yeah, sure.

55. Cris Collinsworth

I like Cris Collinsworth. But his excessive slurping of Julius Peppers, who hasn’t been good for years now, was a bit much.

98. Trent Richardson

Is it possible that he’s the worst starting running back in the league? If not, it’s definitely possible that he’s the worst starting running back in the league on a playoff team, right?

99. Darren McFadden and Maurice Jones Drew

13 carries for 26 yards combined. Way to take the pressure off your rookie quarterback, guys.

100. Johnny Manziel

Obligatory mention

101. Richard Sherman

For the best cornerback in the league, he sure didn’t do a whole lot against the Packers.

200. Andy Dalton Haters

I’m one of them. He shut me up this week. This week.

1,000. Ray Rice

Fuck this guy.


For more of Jeremy Lambert, check him out on Twitter. He can be a good guy (sometimes).....

NFL Round-Up: Week 1

Here's a look back at all the action from week 1 in the NFL accompanied by my witty comments. It will be a real blessing for everyone involved.

(Please note: Since I have actual responsibilities like a full-time job and a baby, I don't actually comment on the Sunday Night Game. Some things are just on too damn late....)


Green Bay - 16 (0-1) @ Seattle - 36 (1-0)

Dominance. That was the story of this game. Last year's Super Bowl champions looked every bit the part again as the Seattle Seahawks whooped the Green Bay Packers (who are legit Super Bowl contenders) in their quest to bring a second straight Super Bowl trophy home to the Pacific Northwest. As of right now, I say this Seattle team looks just as good as last year's team, if not better and that's a scary thing for the rest of the NFL to have to deal with. Green Bay is still a contender in my eyes, but they were basically sheep being led to wolves by having to start the season in Seattle right after the Seahawks got to hang the first championship in franchise history in front of that rabid fan base.

Green Bay Offensive MVP: Jordy Nelson (9 receptions, 83 yards)

Green Bay Defensive MVP: Ha Ha Clinton-Dix (5 tackles, 1 sack, 1 pass deflected)

Seattle Offensive MVP: Marshawn Lynch (20 carries, 110 yards, 2 TD's)

Seattle Defensive MVP: Bobby Wagner (14 tackles)

Up next for Green Bay: vs. New York Jets (1-0)

Up next for Seattle: vs. @ San Diego



New Orleans - 34 (0-1) @ Atlanta - 37 (1-0)

Huge win for the Falcons to kick-off the season after the atrocious season they suffered last year. Matt Ryan has some of the best weapons in the NFL to work with and it showed in this game. His 448 passing yards is ridiculous and if the Saints expect to get to the NFC Championship game like I predicted, they need to work those chinks out of the armor immediately. They didn't give Jarius Byrd all that money in the off-season to have Ryan come in and throw for almost 500 yards. The silver lining for Saints fans is, rookie Brandin Cooks looks like a legitimate play-maker and will be one of the most exciting players to watch this year.

New Orleans Offensive MVP: Brandin Cooks (7 catches, 77  receiving yards, 1 TD, 1 rush, 18 rushing yards)

New Orleans Defensive MVP: Curtis Lofton (10 tackles)

Atlanta Offensive MVP: Matt Ryan (31 for 43 for 448 yards, 3 TD's, 128.8 rating)

Atlanta Defensive MVP: Joplo Bartu (10 tackles, 1 fumble recovery)

Up next for New Orleans: @ Cleveland (0-1)

Up next for Atlanta: @ Cincinnati (1-0)



Buffalo - 23 (1-0) @ Chicago - 20 (0-1)

Did I whiff on the Chicago Bears this year? I mean, I did call for them to win the NFC North and all of a sudden they are losing to the Buffalo Bills and EJ Manuel at home. No one should ever lose to a team quarterbacked by EJ Manuel at home, especially a team with Super Bowl dreams like the Bears have. The good news is, the offense was decent. The bad news is, the Bills ran all over the defense and that's not a good sign for Chicago who has to face RB's like Eddie Lacy, Adrian Peterson, Doug Martin, and DeMarco Murray and would likely end up facing "BEAST MODE" in the playoffs. Giving up almost 200 rushing yards is ridiculous for Chicago's defense, but it's great news for Bills fans. The Bills aren't going to get very far if they have to rely on Manuel to make plays at quarterback and if they are going to win games it's going to be on the back of their running backs and their defense. Buffalo allowed over 300 passing yards to Cutler, but held the Bears to only 86 yards rushing. That's the exact blueprint that the Bills need to win football games in the National Football League and they executed it perfectly.

Buffalo Offensive MVP: C.J. Spiller (15 carries, 53 rushing yards, 3 receptions, 11 receiving yards, 1 TD)

Buffalo Defensive MVP: Preston Brown (7 tackles, 1 fumble recovery)

Chicago Offensive MVP: Matt Forte (17 carries, 82 rushing yards, 8 receptions, 87 receiving yards)

Chicago Defensive MVP: Chris Conte (7 tackles, 1 pass deflected, 1 interception)

Up next for Buffalo: vs. Miami (1-0)

Up next for Chicago: vs. @ San Francisco (1-0)



Tennessee - 26 (1-0) @ Kansas City - 10 (0-1)

Well, that was ugly. Sometimes, football is just extremely confusing. On paper, Kansas City has a much better roster and a better head coach, but this is why you play the game folks. The Chiefs offense was just absolutely dreadful. If that's a sign of things to come, the Chiefs are going to be one of those teams that gets crushed by good teams (Seattle, San Fran, Denver) and will barely squeak out wins against poor teams. I hate to overreact, but the Titans are not a good football team and the Chiefs got crushed AT HOME! The Chiefs needed to win this game in a big way, especially with the schedule they have in front of them and they came out and disappointed in the worst possible way. The offensive line has major issues and I know they were missing some key players on offense (Dwayne Bowe & Donald Stephenson were both suspended, De'Anthony Thomas was injured), but this team is going to regret not improving their wide receiving corp in the worst way in the off-season. Donnie Avery is absolutely awful and needs to go right now. The only problem is the Chiefs have no one to replace him with. This was absolutely positively the worst way the Chiefs could start out the season (Derrick Johnson looks to be out for the year with an injury), but good for the Titans and Jake Locker. I either seriously under-estimated you or the Chiefs or really just that bad.

Tennessee Offensive MVP: Jake Locker (22 of 33 for 266 yards, 2 TD's, 111.4 QBR rating)

Tennessee Defensive MVP: Jason McCourty (3 tackles, 2 passes deflected, 2 interceptions)

Kansas City Offensive MVP: No One. Shame on all of you.

Kansas City Defensive MVP: Justin Houston (3 tackles, 2 sacks)

Up next for Tennessee: vs. Dallas (0-1)

Up next for Kansas City: vs. @ Denver



Minnesota - 34 (1-0) @ St. Louis - 6 (0-1)

Look, I feel for you St. Louis, I really do. However, everyone and their mother knew you guys needed a quarterback if you had any chance of being successful this season and you guys came out and laid a giant stinky egg in your first outing of the season. You guys have a talented roster, but you have a glaring hole at the most important position in the NFL. There has to be someone out there on an NFL roster who's ready to come out and shine in the same way a former grocery clerk named Kurt Warner did for you years and years ago. Whoever it is, the guy currently isn't sitting on your roster, so may want to have Jeff Fisher start checking out the Safeway's in the greater-St. Louis area if you guys plan on being competitive this season. If the Minnesota Vikings can come into your house and score 34 points on you, just imagine what your division rivals the Seattle Seahawks and San Francisco 49ers will have up their sleeves. Let's not put this all on how crappy St. Louis looked though. Let's give some credit to the Minnesota Vikings who actually came out and looked like a balanced football team. Stop playing with my eyes Vikings and go back to your regularly scheduled crappiness next week. Stop looking like a legit playoff team....unless you actually are one? I'M SO CONFUSED!!!!!

Minnesota Offensive MVP: Cordarrelle Patterson (3 carries, 102 rushing yards, 1 TD, 3 receptions, 26 receiving yards)

Minnesota Defensive MVP: Harrison Smith (2 tackles, 1 sack, 1 pass deflected, 1 interception, 1 interception return for a TD)

St. Louis Offensive MVP: Brian Quick (7 catches, 99 yards)

St. Louis Defensive MVP: Aaron Donald (4 tackles, 2 tackles for loss)

Up next for Minnesota: vs. New England (0-1)

Up next for St. Louis: vs. @ Tampa Bay (0-1)



New England - 20 (0-1) @ Miami - 33 (1-0)

Football is a game of four quarters. No one knows that better than us Oregon Duck fans. Sometimes, a team can not look so good in the first half and make some serious halftime adjustments that have the other team's heads spinning on a swivel. That's what happened in the Miami/New England game. New England had a 20-10 lead going into halftime and the Dolphins came out and spanked them in the second half. Miami actually looked good on both sides of the ball in the second half and just out-played the Patriots in every aspect of the game. The Dolphins defense put pressure on Tom Brady which caused the "Wonder Boy" to turn the ball over and gave Miami's new fast-paced offense opportunities to take over the football game. Miami will now face Buffalo next week and one of the teams will start the season out 2-0, while New England heads to Minnesota and faces a very real possibility of starting out the season 0-2 and in a big hole behind either the Bills or the Dolphins.

New England Offensive MVP: Julian Edelman (6 receptions, 95 receiving yards, 2 carries, 21 rushing yards)

New England Defensive MVP: Jerod Mayo (12 tackles, 1 sack, 1 fumble recovery)

Miami Offensive MVP: Knowshon Moreno (24 carries, 134 yards, 1 TD)

Miami Defensive MVP: Cameron Wake (3 tackles, 2 sacks)

Up next for New England: @ Minnesota (1-0)

Up next for Miami: @ Buffalo (1-0)



Oakland - 14 (0-1) @ New York Jets - 19 (1-0)

Did you watch this game? Ya, neither did I. Around my house, we called it "The Toilet Bowl" as both these teams are highly expected to be fighting for the #1 draft pick come December. Sorry if you're angry, but I'm just telling the truth....no matter how ugly it is. Sure, there were some promising things in this football game (Derek Carr continues to show promise and Geno Smith showed some flashes of brilliance), but truth be told, these are two of the worst teams in the NFL and one of them HAD to win. Let's move along....

Oakland Offensive MVP: Derek Carr (20 for 32 for 151 yards, 2 TD's, 94.7 rating)

Oakland Defensive MVP: Sio Moore (13 tackles, 1 sack)

New York Jets Offensive MVP: Chris Ivory (10 carries, 102 yards, 1 TD)

New York Jets Defensive MVP: Dawan Landry (7 tackles, 1 sack)

Up next for Oakland: vs. Houston (1-0)

Up next for New York Jets: vs. @ Green Bay (0-1)



Jacksonville - 17 (0-1) @ Philadelphia - 34 (1-0)

That was a close one. You can breathe a sigh of relief now Eagles fans, because you guys didn't lose to the Jaguars at home on opening weekend, but it was a close one. The game couldn't have started any worse for Eagles fans, but in the end, it all worked out. This was very reminiscent of one of Chip Kelly's games at Oregon. Kelly's teams would usually start out slow and go on a tear in the second half when the defense was worn out and that's what the Eagles did to the Jaguars. The Jaguars are an extremely underrated team though. They are actually pretty solid on defense and managed to give one of the best offensive teams in the league some fits, they just couldn't do it for an entire game. Hold your heads up Jaguar fans. You guys look much improved and shouldn't be considered an easy win for anyone this season. As for Eagles fans, wipe your brow and move along. You survived a close one.

Jacksonville Offensive MVP: Allen Hurns (4 catches, 110 yards, 2 TD's)

Jacksonville Defensive MVP: Ryan Davis (2 tackles, 2 sacks, 1 fumble recovery)

Philadelphia Offensive MVP: LeSean McCoy (21 carries, 74 rushing yards, 6 receptions, 41 receiving yards)

Philadelphia Defensive MVP: Mychal Kendricks (6 tackles, 1 sack, 1 pass deflected)

Up next for Jacksonville: @ Washington (0-1)

Up next for Philadelphia: @ Indianapolis



Cleveland - 27 (0-1) @ Pittsburgh - 30 (1-0)

This game can be described by one thing and one thing only.....

Cleveland Offensive MVP: Brian Hoyer (19 of 31 for 230 yards, 1 TD)

Cleveland Defensive MVP: Karlos Dansby (6 tackles, 1 tackle for loss, 2 pass deflections, 1 interception)

Pittsburgh Offensive MVP: Antonio Brown (DID YOU NOT SEE THAT KARATE KICK?)

Pittsburgh Defensive MVP: Jarvis Jones (6 tackles, 1 sack, 2 tackles for loss)

Up next for Cleveland: vs. New Orleans (0-1)

Up next for Pittsburgh: @ Baltimore (0-1)



Cincinnati - 23 (1-0) @ Baltimore - 16 (0-1)

Whenever the Bengals and Ravens get together, it's a good time. Had you asked me to pick a winner for this game beforehand, I would have given you a confused look because I honestly don't know which team is better. After this game? I can convincingly say that Cincinnati is a better football team than Baltimore is, but not by much. A lot of people have picked the Benglas to be a "flop" team this year and a win over the Ravens in Baltimore to kickoff the season is absolutely huge. I picked the Ravens to win the division and I'm not feeling too comfortable about it now. The AFC North title may once again go through Cincinnati (now, can they just win a damn playoff game?).....

Cincinnati Offensive MVP: A.J. Green (6 catches, 131 yards, 1 TD)

Cincinnati Defensive MVP: Emmanuel Lamur (11 tackles, 1 interception)

Baltimore Offensive MVP: Steve Smith (7 catches, 118 yards, 1 TD)

Baltimore Defensive MVP: C.J. Mosley (7 tackles, 1 pass deflected)

Up next for Cincinnati: vs. Atlanta (1-0)

Up next for Baltimore: vs. Pittsburgh (1-0)



Washington - 6 (0-1) @ Houston - 17 (1-0)

If the Houston Texans are going to make a return to the playoffs this year, they are going to need their defense to play lights out and well....they did. Now, I know Robert Griffin III is far from a good NFL quarterback, but the Texans defense was on fire this week. They held the Redskins out of the end zone all game and were constantly in RG III's face the entire time. It also didn't help matters that Washington was 3-for-12 on third down's and couldn't hold on to the ball. It was not a good debut for new head coach Jay Gruden, but it was a successful debut for Texans head coach Bill O'Brien. Like I said, the defense looked spectacular and the offense was efficient enough to get the job done. I may have been wrong when I said that Houston wasn't a playoff team. Either that, or Washington just really sucks.

Washington Offensive MVP: Alfred Morris (14 carries, 91 yards)

Washington Defensive MVP: Jason Hatcher (5 tackles, 1 sack, 1 pass deflected)

Houston Offensive MVP: DeAndre Hopkins (4 catches, 89 yards, 1 TD)

Houston Defensive MVP: J.J. Watt (3 tackles, 1 sack, 1 pass deflected, 5 QB hits)

Up next for Washington: vs. Jacksonville (0-1)

Up next for Houston: vs. @ Oakland (0-1)



San Francisco - 28 (1-0) @ Dallas - 17 (0-1)

Sometimes you are just better than the other team on the opposite side of the field from you. And sometimes, you are better than the other team on the opposite side of the field from top-to-bottom and I'm talking from roster all the way to owner. This was an unfair fight when it was booked and the score makes it look closer than it actually was. Cowboys are one step closer to getting Marcus Mariota like I predicted weeks ago....

San Francisco Offensive MVP: Colin Kaepernick (16 of 23 for 201 yards, 2 TD's, 5 carries, 11 rushing yards)

San Francisco Defensive MVP: Justin Smith (6 tackles, 2 sacks)

Dallas Offensive MVP: DeMarco Murray (22 carries, 118 rushing yards, 1 TD, 3 receptions, 25 receiving yards)

Dallas Defensive MVP: Bruce Carter (6 tackles, 1 sack, 1 pass deflection)

Up next for San Francisco: vs. Chicago (0-1)

Up next for Dallas: vs. @ Tennessee (1-0)



Carolina - 20 (1-0) @ Tampa Bay - 14 (0-1)

Carolina fans were sweating this afternoon when it was announced that Cam Newton was going to miss the opening game with an injury. There were already plenty of skeptics watching Carolina with a close eye waiting for them to flop on their face this season. With their starting QB out and playing at a divisional rival that's supposed to be a "pop" team this year...the Panthers are extremely lucky to walk out of Tampa Bay with a week 1 win. Derek Anderson actually played a decent game and showed why he's one of the best back-ups in the league (people seriously laugh when I say that). Rookie WR Kelvin Benjamin also had a good game, as did Carolina's defense, which played spectacularly. I still think Tampa Bay is a better football team than they were last year, it may just take some time to get things working properly.

Carolina Offensive MVP: Derek Anderson (24 of 34 for 230 yards, 2 TD's, 3 carries, 10 rushing yards, 108.7 rating)

Carolina Defensive MVP: Antoine Cason (9 tackles, 2 passes deflected, 1 interception)

Tampa Bay Offensive MVP: Josh McCown (22 of 35 for 183 yards, 2 TD's, 2 INT's, 3 carries, 27 rushing yards, 71.5 rating)

Tampa Bay Defensive MVP: Gerald McCoy (8 tackles, 1 sack, 2 tackles for loss)

Up next for Carolina: vs. Detroit

Up next for Tampa Bay: vs. St. Louis (0-1)